Bloom. 💐

I know why the caged bird sings. ~Maya Angelou

Getting sick. 

Has given me many good things. 

The elemental suffering has brought much good. 

takes away my busyness.

forces me to slow down. 


Flesh mortifying.  

Clarity inducing.  

Raised to life. 

Priorities straightening.  

Do or die

Sink or swim

Blooming. 🌼

Turning a corner

I think I’ve turned a corner in my grieving over prodigals and health stuff.

I used to cry about that stuff every day. Especially the kid stuff.

Trying to maintain an attitude of forgiveness. I don’t want to have any hindrances to God being able to work in our lives.

I’m starting to remember the good times and it doesn’t hurt as much to brush up against the subject in conversations.

I don’t like bein’ miserable. That’s a good sign. Grin.

Like I said, I think I’ve turned a corner.

I feel very encouraged by that.

Reboot my ❤


New memories.

Flashback nightmare last night.

Father I need a refuge right now. A safe, protected place, where I can sleep and eat and rest

Then go back and fight.

You are my bunker. My bivouac. (Sp?) My safe place. My good jou jou. Hide me under your wings for a little. Don’t let me forget these long submerged memories from scarier times. I want to take them to the counselor You’re going to help me find, and then eventually use them to help others. OK?

Heart Change 💐

I was in trouble. My marriage was dying by leaps and bounds. My mental health was toast. My faith had been shattered by several consecutive calamities.

  I went on a spiritual retreat called Heart Change in Oregon City, Oregon.  four days. I think they are in other west coast states too, now.

That was 15 years ago. 

God showed up and fixed my heart that weekend.  

I KNOW He loves me and I have his blessing and he showers me with favor.  He likes me. 

I feel like I’m in a spotlight of sparkly like from God now.

I will never be the same.

The Message Bible

Christmas 🎄 sucks sometimes

Christmas is over

Some of our kids didn’t call. No grandkid came.
Three family fights.

One major meltdown.
Resentful sullen offspring.

We got through it, glory to God.


The thing about having kids is:
Once you give birth, your heart is now OUTSIDE your body.

God knows this.

Look at what he said to Mary.  Through Simeon? That old guy who blessed Jesus when they went to give the firstborn offering, for baby Jesus, at the temple?

God gets it.

Let’s speak words of encouragement and support over each other, my friend.

We’re not alone. Other people hurt too. Maybe even you. ❤ me too definitely.

Life is not always easy, even in the western world, where we can often count on full bellies and a warm place by the fire.

Please pray for me and I’ll pray for you.

God’s the only one who can fix our families. (Well, with our effort too. I don’t want to think it’s magic and I don’t have to work. I made plans to start counseling on payday. I apologized a few times. I prayed. I am blogging (help someone else) and I took a nap 😴. )


Thank you Jesus for the good and the bad things in our lives.   We trust you. You’re our only hope.

Let’s go to bed and start over tomorrow, k? Heartfelt hug. 💐

Experienced, kind, and wise 💐

“I was always upset about my circumstances. I wanted God to change them for me, and I wanted Him to change the people around me too. But then He showed me that I needed to work on changing my inner life before I could expect real change in my outer life.

“Matthew 6:33 (NLT) says, “Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.”

“So what is God’s kingdom? The Bible says the kingdom of God is in us. If you’ve accepted Christ, that means He’s living in you, and He wants to live in a good spiritual home.

“That’s why your inner life is so important to God.

“We must seek first His kingdom, letting His Holy Spirit take hold of us on the inside. When we allow Him to work in us, eventually we won’t be able to contain it, and it will spill out and change the world around us!

“Prayer Starter: Holy Spirit, help me not to get caught up in trying to change external things when You’re asking me to focus on developing Your kingdom in my heart. I invite You to work in my inner life”…..Joyce Meyer devo at youbible.

narrow way

Mm. Joyce Meyer —


“may strike fear in some people, but it’s really not a bad word.

“God doesn’t desire to break our spirits,

“but He wants to break that outer shell–

“the flesh that prevents Him from being all He wants to be in and through us.

“He wants to break off things like



selfishness ….


“God wants us to be totally dependent on Him,

“and suffering seems to bring us to that point.”

Things to love 🍀 🍀🍀

Up grieving. So sad, this part of loving something. Don’t let this pain be wasted, God. K? And just please hold me now. 💐

I thank You for the following:

  • Oranges, orange juice, orange zest for bread, marmalade-you just can taste the sunshine
  • Baby plants, tiny and perfect and sweet
  • Red poppies
  • Fresh mozzarella
  • Helping people
  • Amy Grant Chapman Gill…she’s just such a lady and so kind and honest and friendly
  • Enchanted April – im reading the book now. I’ve loved the film.
  • How my kitty comes in silently, like a shadow, and settles herself on my tummy at midnight, facing away from me – a compliment, for she trusts me
  • Castles and wisteria and sunshine
  • Good nurses – brisk and practical and kind
  • Rowan Atkinson
  • Warm sweaters and hot cups of tea
  • Funny socks
  • Interesting accents
  • Word puzzles