Plan for weakness 💐

I figured it out:

Why I miss

whole…chunks…of…time

regarding planned activities:

I just now did it again;

and this time I was watching 👀.

Background info: Yesterday was a terrible health day: I was at Defcon 5 all day with a migraine. I tried everything and finally won. I was praying alllll day just to get through the next 15 minutes! I bet some of you guys can totally relate.

I was in constant dog-paddle, keepmynoseabovethewater-mode with Jesus and memorized scriptures. BTW: Don’t think I’m all spiritual and self-controlled: it called…

~ “s-u-r-v-i-v-a-l”

I feel encouraged.

I thought I was just shallow and lazy and that’s why I kept skipping whole days of planned devotions!

When this happens … I will just get back up and keep going with whatever it is that I have planned.

No more self-imposed flagelation.

Living with mental health stuff

I was looking back through my notes about Q, wanting to give the people that i care about an update. 


DEFinitely a clear change of family direction.  
But not what I thought I was praying for.

A huge difference. 

God has brought my man on board.  He has spoken to him about Q and his mental issues and how he can help. It’s making a huge difference.

Q getting a diagnosis has seemed to really help unlock some help for him too.


Ummm…God had a talk with me about prayer and fasting. Out at the wood shed.

His remarks were extremely pointed. Heh heh heh.


I am not going to just pray this issue away.

My bulldozer tendencies, that have served me so well in the past, will not be needed.

More teamwork and trust; less bossing.

 

Jesus wants us to go through this experience not blow it to smithereens.

I had to do some backtracking with J and my man, telling what He (the Lord) had said at the woodshed.  (It was very humbling. Gulp.)


It seems that (in direct answer to our prayers) God has been doing all sorts of things between those two, father and son. And between Qs twin and himself, and in his relationship with his next sister.

Im glad i didnt know about it and it snuck up on me,  because I definitely would have messed it up.

God and I like my courage and audacity….But I can be a bit bossy and interfering at times. And my hubby already finds my formidable feminine  competence and verbal skills a bit intimidating in his flesh~you know what I mean?

Hubby is like “Ummm…’Scuse me?”

So yeah. God is doing stuff, but mostly not the way I expected..