Why is there suffering?

Hmmm…good point.

Father, help me to focus on You. I don’t understand why things don’t work sometimes.

Why have I been sick for seven-ish years? You could heal me in a snap. I’ve certainly asked You often enough.

I remember that all You said was: getting sick IS your healing. (However that works ~ but You have NO trouble getting Your point across, do You.)

I trust You.

I love 💘 You Jesus.

You are the most amazing beautiful wise humble Person

I’ve ever met

and I am smitten.

Aftermath of the pandemic

~blog that I follow nails this. (Even though the topic is chronic physical pain)

“….it is hard to exactly know where that limit is. We can inadvertently exceed our pain limit and not know it until later that day. And when we do know we did we know for sure the next few days are not going to be fun, at all.

“This is just the way things are with chronic pain. It is hard with constant baseline pain to know when exactly you do too much in a day.

“But you know too little can also be a huge problem. Somehow we have to stay in the middle there.

We know it is a malfunctioning pain system but we still have to stay within our pain and fatigue levels to maximize our functionality and prevent boom and bust crashes, as best we can.” ~~brainless blogger @ wordpress

How do we fix our find broken (overused) alarm system?

Emotional healing needed here

I was thinking about this as regards the global pandemic~ just seems to go on and on and more and more and more bad news until we just feel kind of numb…..I mean, right?

return to the manufacturer for repairs!

~

I need you God! I cannot fix this by myself.

~

Repeat.

This is just the way things are with chronic pain. It is hard with constant baseline of pain to know when exactly you do too much in a day.

But you know too little can also be a huge problem. Somehow we have to stay in the middle there.

We know it is a malfunctioning pain system but we still have to stay within our pain and fatigue levels to maximize our functionality and prevent boom and bust crashes, as best we can”.

Lord I need YOU to reboot my heart .

I need you to help me find my sweet spot ❤ again.

Find beauty

Safe 🌷

I lift up my eyes to you, to you who sit enthroned in heaven. As the eyes of slaves look to the hand of their master, as the eyes of a female slave look to the hand of her mistress, so our eyes look to the Lord our God, till he shows us his mercy.
Psalms 123:1‭-‬2 NIVUK

Flip flop 🌷

All this energy issues from Christ: God raised him from death and set him on a throne in deep heaven, in charge of running the universe, everything from galaxies to governments, no name and no power exempt from his rule. And not just for the time being, but forever . He is in charge of it all, has the final word on everything. At the center of all this, Christ rules the church. The church, you see, is not peripheral to the world; the world is peripheral to the church. The church is Christ’s body, in which he speaks and acts, by which he fills everything with his presence.
Ephesians 1:20‭-‬23 MSG

https://bible.com/bible/97/eph.1.20-23.MSG

Plan for weakness 💐

I figured it out:

Why I miss

whole…chunks…of…time

regarding planned activities:

I just now did it again;

and this time I was watching 👀.

Background info: Yesterday was a terrible health day: I was at Defcon 5 all day with a migraine. I tried everything and finally won. I was praying alllll day just to get through the next 15 minutes! I bet some of you guys can totally relate.

I was in constant dog-paddle, keepmynoseabovethewater-mode with Jesus and memorized scriptures. BTW: Don’t think I’m all spiritual and self-controlled: it called…

~ “s-u-r-v-i-v-a-l”

I feel encouraged.

I thought I was just shallow and lazy and that’s why I kept skipping whole days of planned devotions!

When this happens … I will just get back up and keep going with whatever it is that I have planned.

No more self-imposed flagelation.

Forgiving myself 🌻

“Everyone says forgiveness is a lovely idea, until they have something to forgive,” C.S. Lewis wrote.

” I think Peter would have agreed. He knew pontificating about forgiveness was a whole lot easier than practicing it.
“It’s the doing that gets tough.


“But it’s the doing that should characterize the child of God.
To return evil for good is devilish,
and to return good for good is human.
But to return good for evil is Godlike.”
– -YouVersion devo

Things to 💕

  • Moonlight and Roses, performed by Jim Reeves; played that record every time I visited my Grandma Dodson when I was a kid.
  • Cotton candy stands at the County Fair. I liked the pink flavor.
  • Big band music and warm summer evenings
  • Quiet morning, sunshine, camping, bird song
  • Drive in movies, popcorn 🍿🎥
  • looking through old photos
  • Striped toe socks
  • Barrettes
  • Always Discreet Underwear – just keeping it real
  • Wendy’s 4 for 4
  • Green eye liner ✏️
  • Homemade casseroles 🥘

Different 🌼

There is not in the world a kind of life more sweet and delightful than that of a continual conversation with God.
~ Brother Lawrence

My dad was a negative, impatient person. He had a personality disorder, i think, looking back.

This fact has colored how I relate to God; i was reminded of this during my devotions today.

Father, thank You for showing me that You are not like that. Help me to learn to trust 🙏 and not be afraid of the other shoe dropping.