“NEEDTOBREATHE – “LET’S STAY HOME TONIGHT” [Live From Celebrating Out of Body]” on YouTube

I was just thinking about something with Jesus.

Hubby and I have friction over whether to go out or stay home quite a bit.

Bring it on!

We have regular dates

1. once a week for conflict resolution

2. and once a week for fun.

And he will often say he wants to stay home.

While I have been home all the time and want to get out of my sickbed and see something beside my walls.

Deflated

This song came to my mind as I was pondering……so I looked it up on YouTube and was listening to it again prayerfully with God.

I suddenly saw that this– our home– is my husband’s Oasis.

he’s safe here.

He can rest and relax and let his hair down in respite.

Of course he would not want to leave it!

It’s sweet that he wants me to be in it with him.

I think instead of being resentful at him and thinking he wants me to be constricted and limited,

I will reframe it reboot my heart

and find it endearing

that he wants to be safe at home with me.

We still need to compromise maybe every other time we can go out or something. I need that.

But

it helps me to understand where he’s coming from you know?

#resentfultograteful

#loveunderstandsme

#soulmates

Help me Lighten up, Lord

Jesus bless and help each person
who stops by for just a pair of minutes.

We love 💕 Your words.

We love You.

But help us. It’s hard down here sometimes.

But You knew that.
You came down here.

I remember now. 😉


I’m asking for a hug today, Lord.

I mean that respectfully.

Especially during this pandemic, we need You.

We’re somewhat desperate.

Help us lighten up and not take ourselves so seriously.

We need a good Dad telling us that it will all work out.

Put it in my pipe and 🚬 it

on living in harmony:
The rule of modesty or propriety

“When, as often happens, they break it [the rule of modesty] defiantly, in order to shock or embarrass others,

they are not necessarily being unchaste;

but they are being uncharitable:

“for It is uncharitable to take pleasure in making other people uncomfortable.

” And I therefore regard the great relaxation and simplifying of the rules of propriety which has taken place in my own life time,

as a good thing.

“At its present stage, however, it does lead to

“an inconvenience:

“that people of different ages and different types do not all acknowledge the same standard, and we hardly know where we are.


While this confusion lasts,

I think that old (my mom)

or old-fashioned (me) people

“Should be very careful not to assume that

young or emancipated people (my kids)

are corrupt whenever they are, by the old standards, improper;

” and, by the same token

young people ought not to call their elders prudes or Puritans whenever they do not easily adopt the new standard.I

“A real desire to believe all the good you can of others and to make others as comfortable as you can
…Will solve most of the problems.”
C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity “Christian Behavior” chapter 1

white picket fence

Dreams

We’ve all got ’em.

That’s why first love and heartbreak infamously hurts so much.

Everyone who’s older than third grade knows this, right?

When my first husband left me, back in my early twenties, it wasn’t his physical presence that I missed.  That sucked monkey giblets: don’t misunderstand…

but honestly, I didn’t even like him.

 You know what I mean? He was an compulsively unfaithful alcoholic with control issues.

There’s no way I was missing that.

I mean, c’mon.

It was the dream of building a life together.  

That’s what hurt to lose.

Raising children together.  

Growing old together.

My white picket fence.
🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾🌾

So What’s my point here?

Well, I was just thinking about this stuff with Jesus:

and you know what?

He’s bigger than that dream.

The happiness that I am discovering now,

as I walk with my Father:

Knows

No 

Fences.

 

I am content.

Not liable

Jesus thank You for

c-a-r-e- ing

about

my MS and

my heart problems and

my mental illness and

my parenting failures. 


I want You.
d-e-s-p-e-r-a-t-e-ly

It helps that my life is so difficult for me. 

I’m not tempted to be satisfied with it. 

Not EVEN a choice

If I was

Effortlessly beautiful and

Incredibly popular and

Eminently successful and

had a million dollars…

I would probably focus on that.
Thank You 💗.

As it is, I’m not liable to focus on how easy my life is. (How boring is easy, anyway? I need to be c-h-a-l-l-e-n-g-e-d.)

You’ve saved my life, God. And made it beautiful ❤️.

Thank You.

Boot camp for my brain

I opened my Youversion app to read the Bible today.
So sad and beleaguered, you guys! Rough, loooong night with health stuff.

I tend to get suicidal when my MS is acting up, so I go to the Bible extra hardcore at those times. Even before I start to think in the morning. Knee jerk I’m training 💪 my brain to automatically do.

Armor up, right?

Oh my sparkly socks.

what I found, my peeps!

God’s been doing great things this year! I just read about some of the ways God’s been at work in the YouVersion Community, and I think you’ll love this. Let’s celebrate together! https://blog.youversion.com/?p

Youversion link this morning

Sooooo encouraging!


I hate fakey sacharin sweet Christian-ese.
It makes things feel worse.
So……. I almost didn’t click on it.

But I’m so glad I did after all!
I did not realize what The Holy Spirit was up to during this pandemic!

Self-soothe: an important skill

The prodigal welcome.


This feels too good to be true for me.


I learned to expect painful treatment, as a kid,

if I ever FINALLY penetrated through

my parents’ constant miasma

of negative self talk

about stuff that I needed.

Like a hug or a sweater or a quiet space or kind words.


Not that Mom and Dad meant to hurt me: they didn’t. I’m sure of it.
But you can’t give something that you haven’t GOT, right?

Emotional resources



I was thinking with God about this issue of

what treatment I think I deserve this morning.

I want to reboot my ❤️ with Jesus today about this.

I DO deserve special treatment.

Jesus models it when it says He rose early as was his habit and went to pray alone with His Father,

or when He is obviously saying scripture over to Himself during His death by torture, because look what comes

out of His mouth.

The Father says so. No matter how I _______ in the past.


I deserve the following:
Cozy 🔥 places
Warm sweaters
Hot drinks that taste good
My dog at my feet
My cat in my lap
Fuzzy blankets
Restorative sleep
Nature sounds:

crackling 🔥fire,

bird song,

trickling water,

rain drops on roofs,

ocean surf,

silence,

lapping water,

rustling leaves

Put it in my pipe and 🚬 it

on living in harmony:
The rule of modesty or propriety

 “When, as often happens, they break it [the rule of modesty] defiantly, in order to shock or embarrass others, 

they are not necessarily being unchaste; 

but they are being uncharitable:


“for It is uncharitable to take pleasure in making other people uncomfortable. 

 ” And I therefore regard the great relaxation and simplifying of the rules of propriety which has taken place in my own life time, 

as a good thing.



“At its present stage,  however, it does lead to

 “an inconvenience:

“that people of different ages and different types do not all acknowledge the same standard, and we hardly know where we are.



While this confusion lasts, 

I think that old (my mom

or old-fashioned (me) people 

“Should be very careful not to assume that 

young or emancipated people (my kids

are corrupt whenever they are, by the old standards, improper;

” and, by the same token 

young people ought not to call their elders prudes or Puritans whenever they do not easily adopt the new standard.I

“A real desire to believe all the good you can of others and to make others as comfortable as you can
…Will solve most of the problems.”
C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity “Christian Behavior” chapter 15