Beautiful Abstinence

It’s challenging to find balance when my addiction is a behavior that continues to be a necessary part of my life, don’t you find? It’s like with an eating addiction, you’re not ever going to stop eating. But you can find new ways to think and talk about eating.

Sexual addiction has been my row to hoe. Sexuality, as a married woman, needs to be a healthy part of my life. But am i still able to walk in purity in my mind, you know?

Regarding my addiction du jour: coming up on ten years of abstinence. It feels pretty good. It does get easier, but an occasional rematch is still called for.

I am not beyond falling off the wagon. Ever. I walk careful. I mean right?

I find that so much of addiction involves MY THINKING. I depend on the Holy Spirit to help me. Some of my triggers are very subtle in the beginning, which is when I want to catch any imbalance.

#easiertofix

I have to STAY in the Bible every morning. That’s part of my recovery. If I spend my energy putting GOOD IN, then I don’t have to worry as much about keeping bad stuff OUT.

I don’t read romance novels. Or even go down that aisle in the grocery store. Just maintenance for me. Not for every Christian woman, necessarily.

I watch my language. No, I don’t mean what you would think by that. I mean how I am talking.

Speak life

If I talk about my sexual-ness as a way to bless my marriage, keep holy secrets, and show my loyalty to God instead of a way to prove something to the 🌎 or be selfish or destroy myself, then my thinking tends to fall in line with that.

I love my life. I love my freedom. I respect myself. I am learning to be kind to myself.

Keep to the old paths

Published by strawberry0043

i am married to my best friend. I love Jesus more than life. I have an autoimmune disorder. I have joyfully born five children and been pregnant with seven. I have a disabled child. I have a mentally ill family member who abused my child and lied about it. I have one prodigal child who I may never see again.💚 I enjoy dealing with life as it is, not as it should be.💚 I have been unhappily and happily married to one man since 1995 (thank heaven!) I want to encourage💚 share hope in my world💚 Remind us and equip us to live in this difficult century. 💚June 2020

2 thoughts on “Beautiful Abstinence

  1. Well said. This has actually been my struggle for me for years and years, and my wife has been more patient than anyone should be.

    I’ve found that for me, healing trauma was essential. I didn’t know just how much of my sexual life was trauma habit/response. And having a consistent prayer/scripture life has been vital for my maintenance as well. My Quaker Meeting has done more for me than I could ever express.

    Shame reduction is another big thing.

    Thanks for posting! ❤

    Like

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