Unanswered prayer.

This has been a difficult subject for me.

when I first started to realize that I was really sick, I asked with desperategoingbonkers-ness, for God to please heal me.

He said no.

I DID NOT get it.

I was like, “God You can do anything. This is a snap for You.  Why?”

 I was upset for years.  I just kept going to Jesus because: love 💘. Can’t help it. Where else am I gonna go?

  But I was upset

Recently, this has started to come into focus for me.  
I heard myself telling my egroup, Fireproof, through my ⛪ church (

Getting sick has been the best thing to happen in my life for years.

I think something has been happening in me.

A miracle:

  • Gratitude
  • Wisdom
  • Humility
  • Peace
  • Forgiving others
  • Forgiving myself
  • Acceptance 
  • Slowing down
  • Getting my priorities straight
  • Healing in my marriage
  • Healing in my parenting (two youngest eating it up, middle one is thawing toward me, oldest is offended but trying, one prodigal–im not giving up but still praying)
  • A complete lifestyle change for me from uptight\driven\tortured soul coming toward peace and harmony


Maybe the point of prayer is not getting yes or no.

Maybe the point is a relationship and love and getting  closer and closer to this wonderful Person: God.

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