​Thank you for sharing these things that I have read at wordpress.

I am honored.  I am touched.

I have realized that I am stuck in two of the stages of grieving : guilt and bargaining.

I regret so many things I did as a young mother!

I can’t forgive myself.  I won’t forgive myself.  I keep thinking I can make it up to my adult kids if I punish myself and grovel enough.

If I punish myself enough, I can somehow make up for betraying my true deep self by the ways I acted as a young mom in the grip of mental illness and addiction.  Right?

Wrong.

I need a breakthrough. Please pray for me if you’re talking to God’s right now. 💛

I don’t want to live like this: it hurts too much.

I plan to start lstening to the only sermon I’ve found so far that addresses this without being militarily cheerful 

By rt kendall: totally forgiving yourself

Also plan to look again into the writings of Richard Rhorh

Thanks for listening.

Self hatred

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